I-D-Crisis
What exactly is an identity crisis? Walk with me along the lines of this little editorial and I am sure that you would get to no more. An identity crisis may not be the one that you go through as a person but something that is induced by the people around you. This is the kind of crisis that we are actually interested in. To demonstrate lets start with the siren that wakes most of us up enroute to the first period. We find our doors being pounded on by the paperwallah who insists on collecting his bill from you on that very milisecond. How does he know you? As the sleepyhead who inhabits room XYZ with the ugliest morning breath and a perennial shortage of cash. Move over to the Mess for breakfast/lunch and the mess personnel really know you as the messy eater who makes a fuss about everything that they cook on normal days but a shameless scoundrel on the days of “SDs†when you start haggling for every little drop of mutton “jholâ€. Here the identities are not very cryptic, they are actually a fairly accurate portrayal of the real you!
Shift over to the first period and you find yourself being greeted by row after row of impostors. Everybody a hidden devil with two horns and a penchant for proxy but posing as a straight faced student. When caught in the act everyone claims to be from Jupiter with not an inkling as to what a proxy is! This is when we move into the identity-saver mode. Crisis or no crisis we all are very paranoid about the little thing that every Prof carries which is called a register. We want to be little blue-eyed boys and girls in context to the register but raising hell just about everyhere else!! Moving on to the canteen we again find ourselves in our real avatars where the canteen-wallah knows u as the guy who continuously tries to open an account despite knowing that such a possibility has been vetoed about 20 times before. When we reach the sessional, the lab attendant knows us as the accident-waiting-to-happen and the overseeing professor as the guy who hardly deserves an AIEEE seat but has somehow managed to find one. The dhobi also has much the same impression as the canteen guy but I guess that cant be helped. With so many identities and such contrasting views it is hardly a surprise that we don’t study before for the exams, call it confusion but I prefer something much more technical – how about schizophrenia!!
The Idealist
Evermore inching towards the unreal,
It’s a skill that teaches us how to think,
But how we be, that’s our personal chink,
My eyes seem sullen having thought all night,
Trying to have a vision with imperfect sight,
Watching all and waiting for the contrast to set in,
But never can the truth be gauged and the saint a sin,
Be gifted out for the grey envelopes all that there is
And all your peaks that life may kiss,
Go on and venture forth for fear never did leave any impression
Save barren shells and hope deprived from some-one
It is in my words that I search for me,
Making sense of code that I was never meant to see,
Its all in my eyes and the life before,
If only my myopic tendencies didn’t come to the fore,
Shortcomings of a human include vision
And a handful of ailments that make a father out of a Son
It’s a life that dreads on and onwards still
It’s a vision in need of an overkill,
For words may come and they may go,
Its what they mean to the reader that will let you know,
What it is to have a life and to have lived it out
Or left and been without a shadow and in your own self-doubt
Its my life and it is in the interplay of thoughts
That I weave around and find that I never did call the shots
It is what there forever was and what you helped in making,
Other that what you set about achieveing,
Simple goals never do justice to those close enough
To matter to you, in essence the spring in the bough
The lives that played out their own
Need sing alone and darkness alone has shone,
It is in the risks and the ventures that make,
Also the opinions that your ideas can break,
Actions followed up with a resolve of steel,
That alone can make you realise what you feel,
For the conflict within is what will light he flame,
And it is in their resolution that you will make your name,
It remains of the embers that make a man out of you,
That you become what is in store for a few
The lives and the life can never matter much
But you can try and fail as such,
Better that have a life to reflect and find at inconvenience,
To explain to yourself your own reticience,
Find the hunger that bore the fruit of a million differences
And find the method which gave rise to generations
Of people who changes ideas and ideals
By being there and embodying it themselves
Find the call that kept you here,
The reason they put you here
Be the one that makes change appear,
And the truth that makes doubt disappear…………………….
